i know you're lost. i know you're found. i know you're buoyant upon the waves. i know you can't breathe beneath water. i know you're sinking. i know you're happy. i know you're dying. i know you forgot your favorite ball at school. i know you've lost your father. i know your dog will run away. i know you came in first place. i know you cry while you sleep and i know you forget it all by morning. i know it niggles you though around your shoulders even while you laugh. i know you've swollen the word laughter. i know you've pushed its boundaries and given it new meaning. i know around that meaning you are bruised. i know you're hopeful. i know you need for me to laugh. i know you need to laugh. i know your leg aches. i know you think about extinction. i know you wonder about war. i know you like to kill zombies. i know you watch light. i know you watch me. i know you like breasts. i know you don't know why. i know you are afraid. i know you are curious. i know you are alive and dying. i know. i know you love me. i know you don't know why. i know you're afraid of me, but only as negation. don't make mommy mad. don't make mommy sad. don't make mommy disappear. i know, i know you almost don't know this. you only know it as a shadow. i know the shadow only happened once or twice. i know it was the smallest moment. i know you collect pebbles. i know how to hide shadows. i know you know i think that you're the best. my best. your best. i know around this you're lost. i know around this you're found. i know you close your eyes and imagine. i know you don't know what imagine means. i know that imagining is all you have. i know you believe in the solidness of trees. i know hugs heal. i know silence cuts. i know, i know you are alive. i know you'll never lose your father. i know what it is to lose a father. i know we don't die. i know we don't until we do. i know you are alive. i am here, right here, here, forever here, as real as any tree is real, imagine me here, your mother. let's rise.
