here

It is only when you know it
that you know it
it is only when you've suffered
that you can celebrate
only when the pine holds meaning
only when you have stood beneath its boughs
in summer
light flooding out from the limbs
of this giant umbrella
only when the spring rain has plinked
and clung
and last minute declined its dance
only when the boughs like arms
have taken you in
to cut the wind's autumn's whip
only when you have stood beside
the quiet descent of winter's shoulders
laden white boughs
your arms, its arms
there being little difference,
only then will you know 
and then when you know
when you know it in your bones

when your blood adjusts

when your eyes receive

and you forget to fight
only then are you complete.

it has shadow

all day long 

it broods 

it warns 

and if you dare

it excites 

and when you are spent

it holds you

like a lover spooned

and then

you have it

and it has you.